Walking around the mall on a lazy afternoon, the author was suddenly tapped on the shoulder by a middle-aged Filipino man casually walking by. "Hey, I remember seeing you at the hotel lobby," the man cheerfully recalled, noting the dual-purpose hotel-condominium complex that the author currently resides. The author quickly noted that the man is the security guard as the complex, and struck up a casual chat on his way to the store. The man noted that he was on his way to meet his family to celebrate his 5-year-old daughter's birthday.
All good and well so far. The author notes that the he is looking for a humidifier for his room (as ridiculous as it sounds in a hot humid tropical country, the author is currently suffering from dryness in his constantly AC-ed condo unit). The off-duty guard enthusiastically offered to direct me personally to the nearest home appliance store where I can potentially find something of that sort. He mentions that his meetup with family is a still an hour away, so he has plenty of time to spare. Great. Amid more chatting, we head over together toward the appliance store that he mentioned.
Then, a little turn in the conversation raised the author's eyebrow. The guard mentioned that his daughter loves ice cream (which 5-year-old girl doesn't?) and he certainly would like to get some for her on her birthday. Ok, sure, no problem with that. But then, he notes that this month (February)'s salary he got is a little bit low, and then directly asks, "Could you help me buy some ice cream for my daughter?"...ok...the author certainly did not expect the conversation to take such a turn so quickly, and tries his best to talk the guard out of it...
"Well, if we buy ice cream now, wouldn't it just melt in this hot weather before you meet your daughter in an hour?" The author counters. "That's no problem at all. You can just give me some money, and I will buy it later myself!" The guard replied quickly, with a big smile on his face that almost conveys a sense of matter-of-fact politeness. The guards go on and on about the request up until the very moment he shows the door of the electronic appliance store to the author and bid his goodbyes...
The author is, of course, a little confused by what just happened. The guard did not seem to be joking around when he asked for cash to buy ice cream...certainly, if it was a joke, he would not repeat it several times for 10 minutes non-stop while walking through the mall. But then again, who asks for money to buy ice cream? Without a doubt, the salary of a security guard is not a whole lot, but even then, after feeding the family and paying the rent, he can surely spare a hundred pesos to buy a tub of ice cream, right? Ice cream is not some luxury good, after all.
The whole episode makes the author a little inquisitive on two different but related points: (1) Is the guard using "buying ice cream" as some sort of "testing the water" strategy to figure out just how generous the author is? Let's see if he is willing to give a hundred pesos the first time. Next time I can try to ask for a larger amount to buy something more expensive. Well, at least he stood by a hundred pesos for trial, unlike other "friends" of the author, like real estate agents and random acquaintances from random places who attempted to borrow into the thousands as a first-time try.
(2) How does the guard feel when he is asking for the cash? This is a grown man perhaps twice the author's age, begging for money to a friend in a spotlessly clean shopping mall filled with people. He is not begging a lot of money, for an urgent purpose, for that matter. Does the guy feel ashamed that he is doing just that? Does he feel sorry for himself that he has to put himself down to a maybe-wealthy foreigner? An old Chinese saying goes, "人窮志不窮" (a person can be poor but his morals cannot be poor). Do (some) Filipinos not believe in that?
Ultimately, the author just does not know what to make of these "May I have some money for..." situations that occurs from time to time. The author does believe himself to be compassionate, and willing to help a person in need, especially people who are polite and friendly. At the same time, giving in to such urges for compassion, it feels, will encourage the Filipino to be more and more self-deprecating to the foreigners, when the bright future of the country can only be had when they start to believe in their own abilities to be productive and earn their own money...
All good and well so far. The author notes that the he is looking for a humidifier for his room (as ridiculous as it sounds in a hot humid tropical country, the author is currently suffering from dryness in his constantly AC-ed condo unit). The off-duty guard enthusiastically offered to direct me personally to the nearest home appliance store where I can potentially find something of that sort. He mentions that his meetup with family is a still an hour away, so he has plenty of time to spare. Great. Amid more chatting, we head over together toward the appliance store that he mentioned.
Then, a little turn in the conversation raised the author's eyebrow. The guard mentioned that his daughter loves ice cream (which 5-year-old girl doesn't?) and he certainly would like to get some for her on her birthday. Ok, sure, no problem with that. But then, he notes that this month (February)'s salary he got is a little bit low, and then directly asks, "Could you help me buy some ice cream for my daughter?"...ok...the author certainly did not expect the conversation to take such a turn so quickly, and tries his best to talk the guard out of it...
"Well, if we buy ice cream now, wouldn't it just melt in this hot weather before you meet your daughter in an hour?" The author counters. "That's no problem at all. You can just give me some money, and I will buy it later myself!" The guard replied quickly, with a big smile on his face that almost conveys a sense of matter-of-fact politeness. The guards go on and on about the request up until the very moment he shows the door of the electronic appliance store to the author and bid his goodbyes...
The author is, of course, a little confused by what just happened. The guard did not seem to be joking around when he asked for cash to buy ice cream...certainly, if it was a joke, he would not repeat it several times for 10 minutes non-stop while walking through the mall. But then again, who asks for money to buy ice cream? Without a doubt, the salary of a security guard is not a whole lot, but even then, after feeding the family and paying the rent, he can surely spare a hundred pesos to buy a tub of ice cream, right? Ice cream is not some luxury good, after all.
The whole episode makes the author a little inquisitive on two different but related points: (1) Is the guard using "buying ice cream" as some sort of "testing the water" strategy to figure out just how generous the author is? Let's see if he is willing to give a hundred pesos the first time. Next time I can try to ask for a larger amount to buy something more expensive. Well, at least he stood by a hundred pesos for trial, unlike other "friends" of the author, like real estate agents and random acquaintances from random places who attempted to borrow into the thousands as a first-time try.
(2) How does the guard feel when he is asking for the cash? This is a grown man perhaps twice the author's age, begging for money to a friend in a spotlessly clean shopping mall filled with people. He is not begging a lot of money, for an urgent purpose, for that matter. Does the guy feel ashamed that he is doing just that? Does he feel sorry for himself that he has to put himself down to a maybe-wealthy foreigner? An old Chinese saying goes, "人窮志不窮" (a person can be poor but his morals cannot be poor). Do (some) Filipinos not believe in that?
Ultimately, the author just does not know what to make of these "May I have some money for..." situations that occurs from time to time. The author does believe himself to be compassionate, and willing to help a person in need, especially people who are polite and friendly. At the same time, giving in to such urges for compassion, it feels, will encourage the Filipino to be more and more self-deprecating to the foreigners, when the bright future of the country can only be had when they start to believe in their own abilities to be productive and earn their own money...
I wouldn't read too much into this, culturally. This shit happens almost every day for me here on the Mother Continent!
ReplyDeletehaha, the Mother Continent is definitely more legit on that aspect, I do not dare to compare.
ReplyDelete