Learning to say "No" amidst Unexplainable Anxiety to be Productive
Nowdays, I simply do not get enough days where I have excess time to do things not work-related in any way. In fact, I do not remember a time like today where I have absolutely no plans with any coworker or assignments that I kind of have to work on for the company. Oh right, I was thinking about where I want to go for work in the company after this month's training is over, but that can be saved for tomorrow when I actually have access to the company organization chart.
I am sitting here daydreaming about what my future will be like...but keeps getting these interruptions from the usually active mind that tells me to move on to something more productive. So far for the day I have checked all the recent news articles and good opinion pieces on the Economist magazine...so moving onto my second post for the day (At least the mind is countering this one, writing is pretty high up on the list of priorities even when I am this busy with work)
So within these even-rougher-than-usual sloppy writing, I would like to discuss the importance of creating more of my own time by saying "no" to things you do not want to do. Of course, as discussed before, coworker relations must be maintained in whatever case that come up, but unlike a regular Japanese employee who does not separate his personal and work lives, I, as someone who hates losing independence in anyway, must be able to things on my own without thinking about how bad my relations with others will get because of my unilateralism.
Considering current situation, I am both lucky and unlucky. Lucky that I am not actually stuck in a dorm-like situation where I have to constantly watch others' every move and be watched in a similar way. But very unlucky in that I still have to deal with coworkers who do happen to live nearby and frequently ask me to go to different things with them. For those who live by themselves, it seems that this arrangement is perfect for developing the right sense of distance among colleagues, but I have to say it is not nearly enough for creating my own personal space.
For one thing, because they are your coworkers and not just random neighbors, much more care and attention are needed to make sure relations are maintained at least at a friendly level. Changing an apartment because of personal feuds may be easy, but changing companies for those tiny personal issues are simply ridiculous. And to make the situation worse, with our apartment on a yearly lease, even moving apartments would be impossible for the time being.
I have to say that I am still largely unable to say "no" to anything from my coworker without feeling quite guilty afterwards. In a work environment where the intra-company connections are the best chances for success, I have to say that I cannot afford to be doing much nay-saying, even toward coworkers who live in the same building. Nay-saying today will and must come back to me as vengeful nay-saying that will potentially hamper my career much later on....
So With this in mind, I would like to add to the previous post about my desired workplace. Right now, I feel like I should request a position in any branch office outside of Tokyo. I do not care where the office or what I do as long as no one else in my group also goes to the same place. Come to think of it, since the local offices are so small (generally less than a hundred and some are in the teens for total number of employees), any success there will reflect big in terms of ability because there are relatively few people who can lay claim to your achievements.
And at the more personal level, the need for nay-saying simply disappears. Guaranteed loneliness in terms of lodging and with no one from my year around, I am free to pursue whatever I want when I have no extra assignments from the company, whether it be playing games (I doubt that will last long though) or more importantly, TRAVEL! With little resources for travel around Tokyo, I am really looking forward to exploring other parts of Japan that I have not been (especially Kyushu and Okinawa)
I am sitting here daydreaming about what my future will be like...but keeps getting these interruptions from the usually active mind that tells me to move on to something more productive. So far for the day I have checked all the recent news articles and good opinion pieces on the Economist magazine...so moving onto my second post for the day (At least the mind is countering this one, writing is pretty high up on the list of priorities even when I am this busy with work)
So within these even-rougher-than-usual sloppy writing, I would like to discuss the importance of creating more of my own time by saying "no" to things you do not want to do. Of course, as discussed before, coworker relations must be maintained in whatever case that come up, but unlike a regular Japanese employee who does not separate his personal and work lives, I, as someone who hates losing independence in anyway, must be able to things on my own without thinking about how bad my relations with others will get because of my unilateralism.
Considering current situation, I am both lucky and unlucky. Lucky that I am not actually stuck in a dorm-like situation where I have to constantly watch others' every move and be watched in a similar way. But very unlucky in that I still have to deal with coworkers who do happen to live nearby and frequently ask me to go to different things with them. For those who live by themselves, it seems that this arrangement is perfect for developing the right sense of distance among colleagues, but I have to say it is not nearly enough for creating my own personal space.
For one thing, because they are your coworkers and not just random neighbors, much more care and attention are needed to make sure relations are maintained at least at a friendly level. Changing an apartment because of personal feuds may be easy, but changing companies for those tiny personal issues are simply ridiculous. And to make the situation worse, with our apartment on a yearly lease, even moving apartments would be impossible for the time being.
I have to say that I am still largely unable to say "no" to anything from my coworker without feeling quite guilty afterwards. In a work environment where the intra-company connections are the best chances for success, I have to say that I cannot afford to be doing much nay-saying, even toward coworkers who live in the same building. Nay-saying today will and must come back to me as vengeful nay-saying that will potentially hamper my career much later on....
So With this in mind, I would like to add to the previous post about my desired workplace. Right now, I feel like I should request a position in any branch office outside of Tokyo. I do not care where the office or what I do as long as no one else in my group also goes to the same place. Come to think of it, since the local offices are so small (generally less than a hundred and some are in the teens for total number of employees), any success there will reflect big in terms of ability because there are relatively few people who can lay claim to your achievements.
And at the more personal level, the need for nay-saying simply disappears. Guaranteed loneliness in terms of lodging and with no one from my year around, I am free to pursue whatever I want when I have no extra assignments from the company, whether it be playing games (I doubt that will last long though) or more importantly, TRAVEL! With little resources for travel around Tokyo, I am really looking forward to exploring other parts of Japan that I have not been (especially Kyushu and Okinawa)
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